Wednesday 16 January 2008

Risible Holiday Knitting Efforts

Despite my firm assertion that there would be no ORK handknit presents this Christmas, two items lolled awkwardly off the end of my needles during the course of the holidays.

Item 1: Good Karma Barbie Basic
Why the name? Okay, so tell me. Be honest (if you have ever received any yarn in this way). Exactly what did you do with the yarn that came free with the magazine subscription that you signed up for at your local Knit & Stitch show?

In my case, I walked away from the publisher's stall without noticing that something pretending to be fibre was lurking at the bottom of the 'goodies' bag.

Oh yes, the albatross of all free gifts - perfectly good, functional, eyelash novelty yarn. It has been sitting in my home for 2.5 months batting its petrolum based eyelashes relentlessly at me.

Now, I ain't novelty yarn bashing here - really, I am not. There is nothing wrong with this yarn at all.

If you ignore the niggly knowledge that it was dragged artifically into life, resulting in a Yarn Frankenstein destined to be given away free to knitters, in the full knowledge that it will be either loved or hated (in equal measure). I could not even recycle it, as my council will not take plastic - if I had chosen to consign it to the bin, it would have gone to landfill.

No, nothing wrong with it at all. I simply objected to its perky, fluffy, pink, gold and orange existence. By the way, this aversion is very easy to explain: I am thirty seven and not seven.

Now if you happen to be seven, well then something bright, shiny, fluffy pink, gold and orange might be more your kind of thing? In fact, you might even be delighted with it? (At least that is what I hoped when I reached for the yarn and got out my needles.)

With this in mind, I am proud to present the perfect Good Karma, Barbie Basic scarf. Created and delivered as an extra, bonus Christmas present tucked inside another gift for a seven year old girl:

Gift recipient loved it! Now I might be truly ancient as far as this little girl is concerned but hey, I can remember being seven. Can't you?! I remember the deadly tacky gold acrylic and plastic pearl crochet style waistcoat that was my bling pride and joy. I was heartbroken when it was left behind during a house move...

... I am not so sure that my mother was that upset about its loss.

Good Karma: for vanishing novelty yarn from my house without it going directly to landfill
Barbie Basic: for the colours and the garter stitch used to gallop it off the needles.


Item 2: Baby Hat from One Skein (Leigh Radford)
I must confess that I do not want to spend much time on this as it has turned out to be rather ugly - it is the 12-18 month size.

I didn't like the pattern crown decreases, as they bunch rather than swirl neatly. Also, I knitted it from stash, hence the hat's two coloured aspect and extra eyelet mods to look the yarn changeover look more purposeful. I plan to rip out the seed stitch tie and replace it with i-cord ties. Generally, I acknowledge that I am poking about, trying to improve a sow's ear. This hat is not ever going to be a silk purse.

What am I on about? Well, I guess that it might fairly innocuous sitting there on an upside down vase? Hmm.

Ok, ok. So what? I used cotton and not the recommended yarn. (Hey, I was knitting from stash - it is the 'in' thing and the whole point is that you use up what you've got. Surely?)

And guess what?

Yep. It is huge. Absolutely enormous.

Looking on the bright side, I guess that the gift recipient will grow into it?

When she is about 40.

2 comments:

Robynn said...

I spose the solution is to, um, line it with fleece?!? Dear oh dear... that's one big baby hat.

Btw you can recycle plastic in the giant Tesco bins. Though I do wonder whether plastic yarn is the recyclable kind of plastic!

Anonymous said...

Actually I think it looks like a lovely giant strawberry. Lining with fleece would be good - I even have some you could use so again preventing landfill rules. Babies do have big heads you know and there isn't a huge amount of difference between baby and adult size - honest.
I'm lovin the scarf and I know a six year old who may also be getting one. At least they only dumped two balls on you they managed to gift me with four!